One of the worries I’ve heard people discuss when thinking of fostering is whether they will be supported.
In essence, what support will
they get if they, as the carer, are having a difficult time.
We all have trying times.
Whether with our own kids, the grankids, at work, or with our pesky neighbor
whose dog barks early in the morning.
But in most situations there is
someone you can have a whinge and a moan to, or let loose with.
But fostering is different. Due
to issues of confidentiality you cannot go telling every Tom, Dick and Harry
that young George is being a pain in the you know what this week because he saw
his Dad at contact and is now confused.
So, how do you get support as a
carer?
The main two areas of support
come from social services and other carers.
Every carer has their own social
worker who are the first port of call.. however you may not want to email in or
ring up for things that seem ‘trivial’ but are still an issue.
For me social workers are for
more practical issues, like advice on how to register the child at your GPs,
not for moaning that George keeps pulling the cat’s tail.
This is where another side of
social services can help. There are organised support groups where in complete
confidentiality you can discuss issues with other carers. These are great
for letting off steam.
However what if you need
practical support too?
Well social services offer this
too. They have 24hr of support on the phone. During 9-5 you can ring your
social worker or the duty social worker. In the evening you can ring Out of
Hours for help and advice and from midnight til nine you can ring the Emergency
Duty Team. Basically there is always someone a phone call away for help.
However for all of this I feel
the best support for foster carers is one’s own family and close friends and
other carers.
Family and friends, whilst you
can relay details, can still help out. Maybe babysitting or driving your child
to youth club. Or helping with the weekly shop when you’ve got your hands full.
Other foster carers provide
brilliant support though and are often on ‘standby’ to help each other out,
particularly when you are looking after ‘difficult’ children. There is no
better support than from a carer who knows what it is like to love a child but
have them want to go home to the mum and dad who hit them, or knows how it
feels when you child gets reunified and your heartaches.
Support networks after correctly
a concern of potential carers, but you know, the more carers that live in a
neighbourhood, the more support you can give each other, then the more help carers
have, and the easier caring can be.
It’s never going to be a
easey-peasey role, but if we have each other’s backs, then we can help each
other help the children we look after.
So, I guess what I’m saying is
don’t worry about support. There is plenty of it and when you become a carer
you’ll be helped out by professionals and fellow carers and you yourself
will become a carer that can help out others too.
You’ll join the supportive
family that exists around foster care so we can look out for each other to do
one of the best roles you can imagine: providing a safe, secure, loving home
for Bristol’s most vulnerable kids.
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NB Bristol Fostering is a personal blog and not affiliated with any fostering agency. The author just happens to be a foster carer in Bristol, UK
We do recommend Bristol Council though as they're fab. Bristol Council fostering enquiry form
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