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Teenage kicks

Some friends of mine were asking me about fostering.

They were curious. What does it entail? Who do you look after? Why do you do it?

When you have these types of conversations, as soon as you say you look after teenagers many people reel back and exclaim 'you're crazy, why would you do that?'

We at Bristol Fostering don't solely look after teenagers but predominantly, and to be honest, despite the hormones, strops, dating, school exams and navigating the world between childhood and adulthood, we find teenagers much easier to look after than little ones.

Whilst their are some downsides to looking after teens (the aforementioned hormones for one) there are many pluses but many people are afraid to look after teens.

Got to be honest the best bit is they need more sleep. Not that they're lazy, but their bodies, especially their brains, crave more sleep than youngsters. They literally need more sleep in order to develop properly, so unlike the average seven year old they are not waking up at 6am. More weekend lie-ins can be had if you have a teen.

They're generally pretty independent too. Whilst they may push and try to be more independent than they're ready for, most teens are fine going out alone as long as boundaries are set. This gives you more time to do things round the house or for yourself.

You can do more with teens too! Well, if their hormones and brains let you that is. Little kids are harder to take out to more 'grown up' places. But with your teen you can go see than rated-15 movie, football match or comedy show.

However in some regards they will need more looking after than youngsters as teenage brains are almost hardwired to make them impulsive and irrational. They just can't help it. Whilst their brain is still developing, some areas have developed faster than others, with reasoning one of the last to get itself in gear.

Looking after a teen you will have to deal with puberty, dating, school exams, friendship traumas and more besides, but these issues are something you can help guide the child through. Even the dreaded sex talk.

The first older lad I had was open in this regard. Perhaps too open for someone I only just met. Within five minutes of getting in my house he asked if I wanted to 'do' this girl whose picture he showed me on his phone. Obviously I don't know who this girl is. Whether a celebrity or classmate, and I certainly don't know her age. With my fostering brain on, I diverted, saying she was pretty whilst not actually answering the question. For the first few days he made similar comments as he tested how I would react, then when he was confident I'd let him be his teenage self, he stopped being so crass and discussed girls he liked in a more respectful manner.

Branchout

There are hundreds of teens that need fostering in Britain. There are also scores of older teens who could have left care at 16 but have requested to stay in care because they don't feel ready for the outside world and want help and guidance.

In Bristol this is called Branchout fostering; other areas have similar schemes.

This is somewhere in between having a lodger and a foster child. They need less looking after than a foster child, and more guidance and reassurance. They need a positive role model too. They may need help with budgeting, learning how to cook, drive, clean and do basic DIY. Think less of providing them with a parent figure, and more an older brother or sister who can show them how to look after themselves so when they leave care in the future they're ready.

You'll get an allowance for this direct from the council, usually of around £150-£170 per week. More than you'd get for most lodgers, and it's a lot more rewarding than sharing your home with some random office worker who hardly comes out their room and leaves the toilet seat up!

If you're curious about looking after teen, inquire about fostering, or if an older teen (16+) takes your fancy, ask about Branchout.  You could change that young persons life for the better.

Love Bristol Fostering. x

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NB Bristol Fostering is a personal blog and not affiliated with any fostering agency. The author just happens to be a foster carer in Bristol, UK

We do recommend Bristol Council though as they're fab. Bristol Council fostering enquiry form



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