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Showing posts from April, 2019

Week in the life of a respite foster carer 5

Hello! For those of you unfamiliar, I offer respite foster carer and cover emergencies. I also work two jobs, have a lot of cats and a wild garden. Respite is where you give either another foster carer or a child's family a break by having their child for usually 1-7 nights, quite often just one or two nights. Emergency placements are where Social Services phone you and ask you to take a child that night for at least one night. I've done this a few times and least notice I've had is 30mins and most 5hrs. A couple of these kids have stayed just one night; longest was five nights. I've decided to start twice a month keeping a diary of my fostering experiences as such a carer. Monday - no kids So this week I am 'on call' Mon to Thurs for emergencies and have two children booked to stay with me Fri tea time to Sun tea time. I get home from my nightshift job Monday morning rather tired but struggle to sleep. I have quite a lot to do this week in

What is it like being a LGBT carer?

Foster care reflects our society both in terms of the kids that are looked after and the carers themselves. However in Bristol only around 2% of carers are LGBT, which to me does not feel enough. As far as I'm aware there is also only one trans carer too. I also don't know how many foster children in Bristol identify as LGBT but there definitely are some. As well you might expect. After all there are around 700 children in care in Bristol spread over around 450 carers. I would feel that whomever looks after those children would do their utmost to accept, encourage and love them for exactly who they are. From experience I would say that foster children really do not care if their carer is LGBT. What they care about is what's for dinner and how much pocket money they're getting that week. However I feel that LGBT kids in care would benefit from there being more LGBT carers. Whether full time carers or respite carers. In addition I reckon non-LGBT kids would al

Mental health and foster carers

Being a parent is hard. Those of us who have had kids know this. Whether a single parent or in a couple, its hard. Whether one kids or a whole squadron of them, it is hard. Being a foster carer is just as difficult, if not harder sometimes. The aspect I find the hardest is confidentiality. Not keeping it. I'm spot on with that. But that fact that there are lots of pieces of information you cannot share with others as freely as a 'regular' parent would. As a parent if one of your kids did a naughty thing at school, you may ring your mum to vent. But if your foster child grabbed the privates of another child during class you cant go tell your neighbour. You must respect their privacy, especially if the event relates to them being in care. You can talk to other carers freely however, because all carers keep confidentiality within the service. What I mean is we know we can talk to each other, but not to Jimbo Jones down the street. We can also talk to our social workers

Week in the life of a respite foster carer 4

Hello! For those of you unfamiliar, I offer respite foster carer and cover emergencies. I also work two jobs, have a lot of cats and a wild garden. Respite is where you give either another foster carer or a child's family a break by having their child for usually 1-7 nights, quite often just one or two nights. Emergency placements are where Social Services phone you and ask you to take a child that night for at least one night. I've done this a few times and least notice I've had is 30mins and most 5hrs. A couple of these kids have stayed just one night; longest was five nights. I've decided to start twice a month keeping a diary of my fostering experiences as such a carer. Monday - kids So I was supposed to be having Drederick* stay but that was cancelled about five days ago. One of my foster care friends has been having a tough time and knowing I had a cancellation asked if I'd take their teen for them for the week. You can't just pass kids

How you can help single foster carers (or parents)?

Several recent conversations have got me thinking lately, as well as my own situation. The majority of foster carers are couples, but whilst I don't know the exact statistics, I would estimate around a fifth are single. Just like a single parent, they've got to do everything by themselves. And just like a single parent they may not ask for help when they really need it as they try to hold everything together. As a single carer myself, sometimes I get overwhelmed. I've got meetings, cleaning, cooking, reports to fill in... oh and actually looking after the child or children in question. I usually manage to hold it together whilst I've got a kid staying but when they go home I tend to crumble. I know this, and it's something I'm working on. But what if you're a single parent or carer who looks after children full time? They drain you, no matter how much you love them, how 'good' they are and behave, it can be really draining. As they say, '