Bristol Fostering

Some friends of mine were asking me about fostering. They were curious. What does it entail? Who do you look after? Why do you do it? When you have these types of conversations, as soon as you say you look after teenagers many people reel back and exclaim 'you're crazy, why would you do that?' We at Bristol Fostering don't solely look after teenagers but predominantly, and to be honest, despite the hormones, strops, dating, school exams and navigating the world between childhood and adulthood, we find teenagers much easier to look after than little ones. Whilst their are some downsides to looking after teens (the aforementioned hormones for one) there are many pluses but many people are afraid to look after teens. Got to be honest the best bit is they need more sleep. Not that they're lazy, but their bodies, especially their brains, crave more sleep than youngsters. They literally need more sleep in order to develop properly, so unlike the average seven ye...

What if your only possession was a teddy, a book or a photo? How would you feel if you had to leave the only home you've ever known with a stranger, and then be taken to another stranger's home, to live with a group of people who are all brand new and perhaps scary to you. Not all, but a good proportion of kids enter care with just a small amount of belongings. This could be because they've entered care as an emergency and there wasn't the opportunity to grab much, or it could simply be because the child didn't have many clothes or toys in the first place, so even though their placement is planned, they have limited possessions to call their own. Imagine how you would feel if you were 10 years old, brought to a stranger's home where you could be living for just a day to up to many years. You're not sure what is happening to you, it's all new, but what you do know is that despite the negative situation you were in, you still love mummy and daddy and y...

So, you've been approved as a foster carer, and know somepoint soon a child will be placed with you. You're nervous, worried but joyful. You want it to go well; you want to be a great carer for the child coming to you, but it's a strange paradox, because you wouldn't want any child to have to come into care. You've tidied, cleaned, know your home is safe and secure. You've got an age range in mind, so you've bought some toys, books and maybe some clothes, but until you get that call, you don't know who you're getting. And that call. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. And then it's an email. Depending on who you're fostering with, the placement team will contact you with a mixture of emails and/or phone calls. For me, I usually get an email with a profile of a child and some information, and then email back if I think that child fits my situation, then the social worker rings me to discuss. I'm sure some councils operate mainly via pho...

Someone once told me that if just 1% of LGBT+ adults in the UK fostered then there would be no national shortage of foster carers. Unfortunately the situation is bleak - there are far more kids in care than foster carers available. You may come under the LGBT+ umbrella and would like to do something to help children but haven't considered fostering yet. Or you may have looked into it, tentatively, but not taken the plunge yet. You may be worried, apprehensive or even scared. Well.. For starters your application will not be treated negatively due to your gender identity or sexual orientation. It's illegal for one. As it happens I to come under the LGBT+ spectrum and my social worker couldn't have given a monkeys. In a good way. It was a complete non-issue. In fact during my assessment those many moons ago it was a positive - because I'd be able to identify and help LGBT+ youth in care. Maybe you're worried about how any child who comes into your care will r...

So, you're curious, but also worried. You're thinking, what will the approval process be like? What will they want to know about me, my life, and if you have them, children and partner? Is the process long? It is intrusive? I bet you will have all sorts of questions. I know I did. I was lucky. I had friends who had been through the process and so I had a bit of a heads up. Whilst the application process will vary slightly depending on your local authority or agency, there are some aspects that are (near) universal. Below is meant as a guide. It might not be perfect but if you do apply, hopefully they'll be less surprises. It seems daunting but your council or agency will help you through it. Firstly, after expressing an interest either in person, online or on the phone, you'll probably have a short phone conversation and then an invite to an information evening. These are informal. Usually some slides, a short talk and handouts, followed by a Q&A. With bis...

Fostering, it is difficult. Extremely rewarding, but just like raising any child, difficult. We all need breaks, from work, from our loved ones, from friends and family. Just to be. Be ourselves, recharge, think, relax, and find time to ourselves. If you foster full time this can be hard to achieve. One way this is made possible is through respite care - this is where a child who is looked after goes to another foster carer for a short period. Usually from one day up to one week. If you'd love to be that special person who decides to foster but cannot commit to it full time at present, perhaps because of your family or work situation, then respite could be the perfect solution for you. Most councils or agencies are pretty flexible because they understand how vital it is to have respite carers on their books to provide their full time carers those precious opportunities to recharge. Giving a full time carer a break can make all the difference between the carer feeling posi...

You know, since I became a foster carer I've had friends, friends of friends, relatives and people I've met out at clubs and parties say 'I would love to foster but I dont think I can.' True there are some minimal requirements and a few things that will stop people from fostering, but the list isn't as demanding as some think. So, what do you need? 1. A spare bedroom. Any child in care must have their own bedroom for their benefit, and for that of other children and adults in the home. 2. Time and space in your life. Do you have the time to look after a child? Will it work with your current set up? Will you need to make changes? Can you afford to make any changes? Are you physically able to look after a child? 3. Love. Can you love and help nurture a child that isn't yours? Children in care are often the most vulnerable who need our love and support. Whilst they may not always show it, they, deep down, appreciate the love and care they receive. So, can...

Where to start? With details about me, about the kids I look after and will look after in the years to come? With the answers to the questions you're undoubtedly thinking? Can I foster? Am I too young or old? Do I have to be in a relationship? Can I be LGBT+ and foster? Do I have to own my own home? Well, first off, understandably I wont be able to share the details of any kids in my care. Privacy is paramount. Instead I will offer tidbits and snapshots and little insights that I hope you find helpful. About the title... well I am based in Bristol, UK, a city which I love, and whose people I adore. But, like every town and city in the UK, there are not enough foster carers. I hope that by reading this blog you may be spurred into picking up that phone and making an inquiry with your local authority, or you fill in that online form, or attend a local drop in meeting. Btw I'm not tied to any agency or authority, this is my own brainwave. The first step, as they say, i...