Hello!
For those of you unfamiliar, I offer respite foster carer and cover emergencies.
Respite is where you give either another foster carer or a child's family a break by having their child for usually 1-7 nights, quite often just one or two nights.
Emergency placements are where Social Services phone you and ask you to take a child that night for at least one night. I've done this a few times and least notice I've had is 15mins and most 5hrs. Some of these kids have stayed just one night; longest was five nights.
I've decided to start twice a month keeping a diary of my fostering experiences as such a carer.
Monday - no kids
No kids due to come on Monday which is good as I'm rather tired. I sleep in a bit after a long night at work but my slumber is shortened by social services ringing to say they may have a boy for me for later in the week but are not sure yet. They're just double checking I'm actually free. The social worker says she will email me over his paperwork later for me to read over.
I get up feel rather groggy having not really had enough sleep but if I have more I wont sleep at night.
An admin also emails me some paperwork for my annual review which is coming up soon.
Tuesday - no kids
I'm still shattered but try to get up a decent time. But by doing so I've only had about three hours sleep. I feel like ... well, not good.
The admin from Mon rings to sort a day for a visit for two weeks' time to do my renewal paperwork and health and safety check.
To my surprise my social worker pops by in the afternoon as she was in the area. We have a mini catchup about some issues the previous week and also she has good news. I'm getting a small payrise. Yay. Better than a poke in the eye. Actually I am very pleased even if I may not seem so.
I also get emailed the paperwork for the possible boy for Weds. I ring the Placement team and say I am up for him staying but need a bit more info. They assure me his social worker will ring during the day, but alas they don't so I haven't said a firm yes or no for the child.
I've also possibly got an older boy coming Thurs but am waiting on that too. So two unknowns.
Wednesday - no kids
First thing Placement ring and ask about the boy I said I'd have. I tell the social worker that no one got back to me so I hadn't said yes yet. She runs off (literally) and finds him in the building and gets him to speak to me. We have a good chat about the boy and I say its a 'yes' from me.
During the middle of the day I go visit family and leave early to ensure I'm back on time for the young lad. However on my journey back home I get a phone call to say a better option for him has been found. True its a much better option as its for a longer period which will give him a bit more stability. Still I can't help be a bit dissapointed as I had lots of ideas of where to take him this week. I'm aware kids fall through a lot though.
I still don't know if another possible child is coming so I chase this up with my social worker.
So Wednesday I end up with no kids and when I get home I just relax gardening.
Thursday - kids
First thing, literally first thing, I'm asked to take a child by another carer as an emergency has sprung up, but my social worker is out on visits, so I speak to the duty social worker (this is the one you can speak to if your social worker is unavailable). The lad will come to me, in theory about 10mins after I say yes, (I said yes 9:50 and he was due 10:00) but actually doesn't turn up for about half an hour. He's really upset when he gets to me, literally crying, but he quickly settles and is chatty. Even though he's not going to be staying over I give him a tour of the house including bedrooms and garden. He settles down and plays some computer games with me watching. He perks up when I offer to take him out for his favourite type of food (from where he was born).
Dinner out was fab. We were the only patrons as we went to the restaurant quite early. He absolutely beamed when his meal was served as he hadn't had home comfort food for a good while. He ate loads and got me to try some rather spicy foods!
After dinner we had a little bit of time before his carer picked him up so we played some more computer games. He left happier then when he arrived but there were probably more tears when he got home.
During the day my social worker had confirmed that the Afghan child will not be coming.
Friday - kids
Nearly 'got away' with no kids. I'm 'on call' until 5pm and at 4:57pm I get a call from a private number. That means social services. I answer and they dispense with the usual patter. They have a child who needs a room now. Really like now. Until Monday. I ask what info they have. Not a lot really. First name, age, gender and that's it. I point out I'm unavailable part of Saturday due to a prior commitment. The placement staff member hangs up for a bit and chats to someone else and rings me back. Yes, they've arranged for the child to be taken out for a few hours on Saturday if I take them. I say yes. The rooms are ready so I don't really do anything but wait.
Fifteen minutes later they turn up. I go outside to meet them at their car. Its a young girl with a support worker. First thing I notice is the box of Lego in the boot as the lids come away. I positively love Lego but try not to get too excited as this is a serious matter of a girl coming into care, however it does provide a good talking point. I help the child bring their three bags of clothes and two small boxes of belongings inside. They come in with the support worker and we have a little chat about plans for the weekend so their is no surprises for the little one.
Whilst they go explore the house I speak to the support worker who acknowledges so far social services have no place for this child come Monday. They are desperately looking but so far are drawing up blanks. In one sense you might not think it matters as after Monday the child is not in my care, but if they ask I want to have the information to hand. But it turns out there is nothing to tell them. So if the child asks what is happening on Monday all I can tell them is they'll be picked up in the morning and a place will be found for them.
The support worker doesn't stay long. Once they leave I show Sherri around the home and then asks what she wants for tea. Chinese is the answer, so I duly oblige with a takeaway. They settle down in their room easily and ask to play on the PS3. We do indeed do that for the rest of the night. They go through the games I've got. Not really settling on any but enjoying each for 20 mins or so. Sherri is painfully shy the vast majority of the time but occasionally chatty too. She gets herself off to bed no problem though quite late.
Saturday - kids
Sherri is with me until Monday and is being taken out in the morning by a support worker whilst I go to a prior engagement. The support worker is bang on time but Sherri is running a tiny bit late having only just hopped in the shower. I've made them a breakfast to take away with them of fruits - which they asked for for breakfast. Whilst Sherri is out I pop out to my prior engagement but leave a little early to make sure I'm back in time for Sherri. She's back dead on time again though she's a bit shy of coming back into the house as she doesn't want to go out tonight. - I've told her we are meeting up with another foster child and a couple of carers at an event in town. She takes some persuading to come inside - a promise of a quiet day on Sunday.
Late afternoon another child turns up with his carer and we go (Sherri, lad and me) get the bus to an event in town where I promise them dinner and some spending money. However neither is really that interested. Sherri is feeling shy and lad is being grumpy. We meet up with two friends of mine and chat for a bit and the wonder around a bit too. Sherri bumps into a school friend and suddenly livens up. They ask to go off together for a bit - I allow this after meeting the friend's mum. But it feels weird letting Sherri wander off for a bit. I know she needs freedom and trust and she does come back bang on time but I do worry about losing her. Meanwhile lad has found some people to play football with and plays for a good hour. When its time to go he doesn't want to go but we need to head off. Both kids seem wary of each other but when we get back to mine actually chat to each other, pity then lad's carer comes quite soon to pick him up. Sherri gets to bed really late, as do I. Way gone midnight. Naughty us. - She was never gonna sleep regularly for a first few nights in care anyway.
Sunday - kids
Sherri and I sleep in in the morning. Well til 1030 but that's quite late for me. She's quite sleepy but asks if we can do some drawing and Lego which we do for most of the day.
In the evening she packs her belongings up ready for her to be collected in the morning. I haven't prompted her - of her own will she's packed and tidied her room. She's also been a bit more chatty this evening and we, on the whole, have a relaxing time.
I do my paperwork for Sherri tonight so I dont have to do it at a later date. I know I'll miss her once she is gone.
Extra
After Sherri has left my care I find out that Bristol City Council could not find a bed for her in Bristol and she is sent out of county. To South Wales. I'm pretty darn upset by this. She was a little gem. But Bristol hasn't got enough carers. Sad to say.
All the best, BF
NB Bristol Fostering is a personal blog and not affiliated with any fostering agency. The author just happens to be a foster carer in Bristol, UK
We do recommend Bristol Council though as they're fab. Bristol Council fostering enquiry form
For those of you unfamiliar, I offer respite foster carer and cover emergencies.
Respite is where you give either another foster carer or a child's family a break by having their child for usually 1-7 nights, quite often just one or two nights.
Emergency placements are where Social Services phone you and ask you to take a child that night for at least one night. I've done this a few times and least notice I've had is 15mins and most 5hrs. Some of these kids have stayed just one night; longest was five nights.
I've decided to start twice a month keeping a diary of my fostering experiences as such a carer.
Monday - no kids
No kids due to come on Monday which is good as I'm rather tired. I sleep in a bit after a long night at work but my slumber is shortened by social services ringing to say they may have a boy for me for later in the week but are not sure yet. They're just double checking I'm actually free. The social worker says she will email me over his paperwork later for me to read over.
I get up feel rather groggy having not really had enough sleep but if I have more I wont sleep at night.
An admin also emails me some paperwork for my annual review which is coming up soon.
Tuesday - no kids
I'm still shattered but try to get up a decent time. But by doing so I've only had about three hours sleep. I feel like ... well, not good.
The admin from Mon rings to sort a day for a visit for two weeks' time to do my renewal paperwork and health and safety check.
To my surprise my social worker pops by in the afternoon as she was in the area. We have a mini catchup about some issues the previous week and also she has good news. I'm getting a small payrise. Yay. Better than a poke in the eye. Actually I am very pleased even if I may not seem so.
I also get emailed the paperwork for the possible boy for Weds. I ring the Placement team and say I am up for him staying but need a bit more info. They assure me his social worker will ring during the day, but alas they don't so I haven't said a firm yes or no for the child.
I've also possibly got an older boy coming Thurs but am waiting on that too. So two unknowns.
Wednesday - no kids
First thing Placement ring and ask about the boy I said I'd have. I tell the social worker that no one got back to me so I hadn't said yes yet. She runs off (literally) and finds him in the building and gets him to speak to me. We have a good chat about the boy and I say its a 'yes' from me.
During the middle of the day I go visit family and leave early to ensure I'm back on time for the young lad. However on my journey back home I get a phone call to say a better option for him has been found. True its a much better option as its for a longer period which will give him a bit more stability. Still I can't help be a bit dissapointed as I had lots of ideas of where to take him this week. I'm aware kids fall through a lot though.
I still don't know if another possible child is coming so I chase this up with my social worker.
So Wednesday I end up with no kids and when I get home I just relax gardening.
Thursday - kids
First thing, literally first thing, I'm asked to take a child by another carer as an emergency has sprung up, but my social worker is out on visits, so I speak to the duty social worker (this is the one you can speak to if your social worker is unavailable). The lad will come to me, in theory about 10mins after I say yes, (I said yes 9:50 and he was due 10:00) but actually doesn't turn up for about half an hour. He's really upset when he gets to me, literally crying, but he quickly settles and is chatty. Even though he's not going to be staying over I give him a tour of the house including bedrooms and garden. He settles down and plays some computer games with me watching. He perks up when I offer to take him out for his favourite type of food (from where he was born).
Dinner out was fab. We were the only patrons as we went to the restaurant quite early. He absolutely beamed when his meal was served as he hadn't had home comfort food for a good while. He ate loads and got me to try some rather spicy foods!
After dinner we had a little bit of time before his carer picked him up so we played some more computer games. He left happier then when he arrived but there were probably more tears when he got home.
During the day my social worker had confirmed that the Afghan child will not be coming.
Friday - kids
Nearly 'got away' with no kids. I'm 'on call' until 5pm and at 4:57pm I get a call from a private number. That means social services. I answer and they dispense with the usual patter. They have a child who needs a room now. Really like now. Until Monday. I ask what info they have. Not a lot really. First name, age, gender and that's it. I point out I'm unavailable part of Saturday due to a prior commitment. The placement staff member hangs up for a bit and chats to someone else and rings me back. Yes, they've arranged for the child to be taken out for a few hours on Saturday if I take them. I say yes. The rooms are ready so I don't really do anything but wait.
Fifteen minutes later they turn up. I go outside to meet them at their car. Its a young girl with a support worker. First thing I notice is the box of Lego in the boot as the lids come away. I positively love Lego but try not to get too excited as this is a serious matter of a girl coming into care, however it does provide a good talking point. I help the child bring their three bags of clothes and two small boxes of belongings inside. They come in with the support worker and we have a little chat about plans for the weekend so their is no surprises for the little one.
Whilst they go explore the house I speak to the support worker who acknowledges so far social services have no place for this child come Monday. They are desperately looking but so far are drawing up blanks. In one sense you might not think it matters as after Monday the child is not in my care, but if they ask I want to have the information to hand. But it turns out there is nothing to tell them. So if the child asks what is happening on Monday all I can tell them is they'll be picked up in the morning and a place will be found for them.
The support worker doesn't stay long. Once they leave I show Sherri around the home and then asks what she wants for tea. Chinese is the answer, so I duly oblige with a takeaway. They settle down in their room easily and ask to play on the PS3. We do indeed do that for the rest of the night. They go through the games I've got. Not really settling on any but enjoying each for 20 mins or so. Sherri is painfully shy the vast majority of the time but occasionally chatty too. She gets herself off to bed no problem though quite late.
Saturday - kids
Sherri is with me until Monday and is being taken out in the morning by a support worker whilst I go to a prior engagement. The support worker is bang on time but Sherri is running a tiny bit late having only just hopped in the shower. I've made them a breakfast to take away with them of fruits - which they asked for for breakfast. Whilst Sherri is out I pop out to my prior engagement but leave a little early to make sure I'm back in time for Sherri. She's back dead on time again though she's a bit shy of coming back into the house as she doesn't want to go out tonight. - I've told her we are meeting up with another foster child and a couple of carers at an event in town. She takes some persuading to come inside - a promise of a quiet day on Sunday.
Late afternoon another child turns up with his carer and we go (Sherri, lad and me) get the bus to an event in town where I promise them dinner and some spending money. However neither is really that interested. Sherri is feeling shy and lad is being grumpy. We meet up with two friends of mine and chat for a bit and the wonder around a bit too. Sherri bumps into a school friend and suddenly livens up. They ask to go off together for a bit - I allow this after meeting the friend's mum. But it feels weird letting Sherri wander off for a bit. I know she needs freedom and trust and she does come back bang on time but I do worry about losing her. Meanwhile lad has found some people to play football with and plays for a good hour. When its time to go he doesn't want to go but we need to head off. Both kids seem wary of each other but when we get back to mine actually chat to each other, pity then lad's carer comes quite soon to pick him up. Sherri gets to bed really late, as do I. Way gone midnight. Naughty us. - She was never gonna sleep regularly for a first few nights in care anyway.
Sunday - kids
Sherri and I sleep in in the morning. Well til 1030 but that's quite late for me. She's quite sleepy but asks if we can do some drawing and Lego which we do for most of the day.
In the evening she packs her belongings up ready for her to be collected in the morning. I haven't prompted her - of her own will she's packed and tidied her room. She's also been a bit more chatty this evening and we, on the whole, have a relaxing time.
I do my paperwork for Sherri tonight so I dont have to do it at a later date. I know I'll miss her once she is gone.
Extra
After Sherri has left my care I find out that Bristol City Council could not find a bed for her in Bristol and she is sent out of county. To South Wales. I'm pretty darn upset by this. She was a little gem. But Bristol hasn't got enough carers. Sad to say.
All the best, BF
NB Bristol Fostering is a personal blog and not affiliated with any fostering agency. The author just happens to be a foster carer in Bristol, UK
We do recommend Bristol Council though as they're fab. Bristol Council fostering enquiry form
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